Even If

In the book of Daniel King Nebuchadnezzar builds a large image of gold and commands everyone in the kingdom to bow down before it.
But three men refused.  These three men were brought before the King who then told them to bow down to the image he built, or he would throw them into the furnace.

I love their response.

If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king.  But EVEN IF he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.

They had faith.  They had faith and trust in God even if they were going to be burned alive.

I wanted this response last year when Gavin died.  I wanted this response in my heart.  But it wasn't my first reaction.  I was angry and broken.  And somedays I still am.
But I feel like my family has been learning to live this response.
We keep trusting God, we keep serving Him and following Him even when His plans don't make sense.

I have been praying for God to let me have this reaction with whatever happens next in our life.
And I feel He is giving me that chance once again, stretching me and changing me.

My daughter has been praying some very bold prayers for 7 months now.  These prayers are not anything that we told her or asked her to pray for.  They are all from her heart.  And I don't know how these prayers are going to come about or if they even will.  So we tell her to pray, to ask God because He is in control.

And I haven't wanted to talk with my five year old about the times God answers our prayers in different ways.  But we have lived through this, she knows it.

So today I feel God giving me the chance to have the response of these three men.

Even if my daughter's prayers aren't answered the way her heart thinks and so desires, we will still serve God.  We will still love God.  We will still follow Him and His plans.

Even if.

WISE PREPATORY PRESCHOOl

We would love to have you join and partner alongside this great ministry.

Brice and Amanda Wurdeman moved to St. Vincent with their three children in December 2011. They are missionaries on the island and the directors at Windward Islands School of Evangelism.
They have such great love and hearts for others. 

They have now started a preschool to reach more for Jesus.
Despite living the island life, some of these children come from poor homes. And some of these homes are without electricity and running water.

Your $25 monthly sponsorship, your love, and your prayers will help with many things each day including:
*Help pay a helper teacher. She is from St. Vincent and this is her very first job. It helps provide for her family.
*Help children receive education and to be able to learn and play with other children their age in a safe and loving environment.
*Help children hear a Bible story and hear about Jesus’s great love for them.
*Help feed a snack to each child.
*Help pay for their school uniforms.
*Help pay for the fans and lights in the classroom.

Contact me for more information.
Thank you.
Janna Conklin


To read more about WISE:
http://www.windwardislandsschoolofevangelism.org/

To follow along Brice and Amanda's heart and love for others:  http://briceamandawurdeman.blogspot.com/

Heaven Home

Home. Yesterday we closed on a house we used to call home. And while I was excited and praising God for providing buyers, I was heartbroken too. I envisioned watching both of my sweet children growing up in that house. I loved seeing my husband walk in from work and the kids tackling him. I had these plans for our life. But they were not what the Lord planned. And I have learned through this past year that His ways are not like my ways, and His thoughts not like my thoughts. His ways and thoughts are higher, though at times I do not understand. Today I struggle to call anything home and I believe that is okay. Because I love my family. I love where God has us serving. I love Real Life Church. I love the beauty of California that brings joy to my soul, and the sweetness of the new people God is putting in our lives. I love my close friends and family that just get me and know when I need to talk everything out and have a good long cry. I love to walk my sweet tiny princess to school and pick her up each day. I love seeing her excitement when her daddy walks in the door from work. I love seeing my husband pour his heart out for the Kingdom work God has set before him. And I love I get to hold his hand and be his wife. I love that God brought Gavin into our lives and now my sweet baby boy is in the arms of Jesus. I love the goodness God is pouring onto us each day. I love the hope He gives us as an anchor for our souls. I love how He loves me and desires me even through my questions and my wandering. The lesson God wants me to grasp is this place is not our home. Gavin is home and so many others that have gone before us are finally home. They are home with Jesus and that gets to be our home as well one day. And that is our home, our heaven home. But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await our Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like His glorious body. Philippians 3:20-21

Lyndlee and I found these at Target Dollar spot. They had all these different things you could use and we couldn't believe how perfect each was for our sweet family. Brennan loves cooking and feeds us so well. Brennan and Lyndlee like when I have my hair in pigtails. Lyndlee is the princess in love with horses. And Gavin and balloons are a perfect match.

Brennan is gone this weekend taking college kids camping. So Lyndlee and I have been missing him and Gavin deeply but making the most of these days. Its the weekend for princess time, craft making, and a lunch date to Tea Garden Restaurant. Only my daughter would get more excited over the plastic around the chocolate dessert. She asked if she could take it home and said she had a great idea for it. She made it into a craft. Only my daughter.

God is faithful friends. It seems like on the days when it just seems to be too much or I have reached my limits, He is there or sends a friend. My mom or a close friend will call and just really pour into my life. It is such medicine for my soul. Thank you friends for encouraging me and I pray I am in turn encouraging you and pouring into your lives. Today I volunteered in the three year old class at church. God is doing some things that I don't quite understand. I asked to help and this was the room that needed help. I want to be obedient and listen to His call. I was hesitant to go but my sweet girl encouraged me this morning with her smile and kindness. We put on our shoes, Lyndlee putting on her fancy Leanne shoes, and walked out of the house in faith; trusting in God's goodness, love and mercy. Being in the three's room, seeing these sweet kids and thinking of my Gavin being three yes broke my heart but I also see it did my heart good. These were beautiful creations of the Father that I got to spend just a few moments with. I stayed though at times I wanted to walk away. I played with the kids. And even when a sweet little Asian boy walked in and it nearly knocked me off my feet, I still stayed. Volunteering in that room may not be the best fit for me and that is okay. This week I am helping at a local preschool in the three year old room. Again I don't know what God is doing but I am excited to see what unfolds. Perhaps maybe this is to heal my heart more, to let me love on these sweet kids and let me think of my sweet boy at the same time.

School for Lyndlee has been such a great time. She doesn't cry when we leave her. She has met a good friend that lives just a few houses down from our house. They look for each other in the morning at recess and are so sweet. And every craft she brings home you better believe she tapes it on her wall. I love my crafty girl.