Letting Go, Seeing Him

I dislike planners. I dislike calendars. I get annoyed with timelines. 

You see I struggle with control and all these things help me control. 

I realize I only have total peace when I let it all go. I see Jesus more and His work when I open my eyes to His goodness and plans. 

Why do we set up our life and timeline the way we want it and then beg God to do it our way  Why do we think we know best?  And then we are completely devastated when things don't go as we planned. We are left doubting God and His purpose. 

I do this and desire to be free. 

The past year I have felt such freedom. 

Freedom from control, from planning and simply just letting Jesus.

And he has shown His goodness in mighty ways, ways I didn't foresee or plan. 

Moving to California.

Healing our hearts a little more each day.

Giving us hope, grace, strength, and love. 

Adopting our second son. 

We just got back from spending a week with our son Israel. He is amazing and loud, funny and sweet. 

And we didn't plan these things but God did from the very beginning.  

I got to watch my daughter's prayers unfold in two parts, as she got to know her little brother and also as she got to meet her birth sister.

God answered her prayers in ways we didn't plan but in ways He put forth into motion. 

He gave me a renewed hope in her child like faith. 

He is for us. He sees us and hears us. And He has plans for us.

And when I let go, I see Him more clearly and have such freedom.

Thank you Jesus. 

Keep opening my eyes.

All because of her prayers

Lyndlee started praying so long ago.  It was shortly after Gavin's death.  She was heart broken and missing her brother, her best friend.  So she asked us if she could pray for sisters.

I was reluctant to encourage her prayers as I didn't know how God would carry it out.

I was scared to love again, and to loose again.

But we encouraged her.

We told her God hears our prayers, that He might not answer them the way we want them to be answered.  But He hears us and is for us.

We were living this in our life, God answering prayers in different ways.

We prayed for God to heal Gavin and breathe air back into his lungs, the healing we wanted.

But God did heal Gavin.  He healed our son in the most beautiful way.  He welcomed him home forever!  And one day He will welcome us all!  Come Lord Jesus Come.

For 8 months Lyndlee prayed.  She rarely forgot and thanked God over and over again for bringing her siblings soon.

My prayers started.  I prayed God would change Lyndlee's heart or move in her prayers.  And I prayed this and cried it out numerous nights.

The very night my phone rang with an international phone number, I had just finished praying and crying out to God.

God heard her prayers, changed them a little; but heard my little five year old daughter's request.

So in 12 days we are headed out of the country to meet our second son!

We were in love the moment we saw his picture and cannot wait to meet him and get to know him.
We are naming him Israel.  He is 15 months old and is beautiful.

We covet your prayers as the week will be filled with many meetings and our court date.
January 20th-26th we will be traveling.

We will come back to the states and wait some more time before we can bring Israel home to our little family the Lord has given.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.  James 1:17